Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Sinking in

Sorry I haven't blogged in so long. I wanted to make sure everyone got a chance to read the last post, and then everyone reacted so strongly that I needed some time with just my family. We needed time together to let it absorb and become our new normal and explore what we're going to do with it. Knowing that you all do it out of love - you all try to 'fix' it or make it better - and that was so not what I needed the last two weeks. I needed to face reality and cope.

We also had another family health issue come up, so my uncle has been staying with us while he recovers from and adjusts to some serious kidney problems.

Plus, I've been asleep. The new pain meds they gave me are super strong and they knock me out. Without warning. Leaving my kids are unsupervised. SO not cool!

I've also done two chemo treatments. I figured I might as well do them while I waited for my doctor to get back in town. This chemo is ROUGH. I've been more sick and more sore with this than with any other chemo I've done.

Just because I didn't want to get bored - it's also back-to-school time. Nyla had to come over and take the paperwork in for me. I'm not allowed to drive anymore and Steve doesn't get off work until everything is closed. Thankfully, Nyla stepped in, and we got them registered just in time. BigSister starts 6th grade tomorrow. BoyChild starts Kindergarten on Thursday. We JUST found that out this afternoon - after getting the run around about the K class being full and having to find a place for him. The school they put him in doesn't start til Thursday. Grrr! Daddy is going to tell him after work - because Mommy is way too much of a wuss.

Tomorrow is my doctor's appointment. I believe we will be discussing whether or not there are any more options and if any of them are going to work for me. Considering they've already said things like 'making me comfortable' and 'getting my affairs in order' - we're not walking in feeling very optimistic.

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Kimberly said...

I know I can't fix it, but I can pray and I will.

Anonymous said...

This is why I just tell you I love you. My words won't fix it, but at least lets you know I care :)
Indiana loves you !!

Jen, Zayne, Mom and Tim

Karen said...

Hi. I just found your blog after noticing you were following my blog. Sorry to hear about your situation. Sounds like you are accepting things and dealing with them as best you can. I will keep you and your family in my thoughts.

Loretta said...

I'm sorry...I wasn't trying to fix it or make it better, just let you know you were in my prayers. I'm in basically the same situation you're in, stage IV cancer with a really bad prognosis, so I know that nothing anyone says can make things any better. That's why I told you that I'd be praying for you to have wisdom to make the right choices for you and your family. I'll still be praying that for you.

I Should Be Cleaning Up said...

Dito. How can words even begin to give comfort?

Anonymous said...

Jes, I don't know you well, but I know enough to know that you're an amazingly strong and courageous woman. I think about you often and constantly wish your news was better. Add me to those that care about you and admire your strength. Take good care, honey.

TWOD Board Member